January 27th

I love this film, I always forget about it, but whenever I think about masks it reminds me of the beautiful dance scenes. When I was young this film was one of my favourites, and still is to date, I used to enjoy watching it, but when the trolls and scary masks appeared it'd always be through my fingers. Theres something fantastic about masks, venetian ones are to die for, I wish I knew the reason behind the haunting, scary looking ones.

Note: Google it. I used to have this really strange crush on David Bowie in this film, and my god how tight are his leggings! Thinking of hitting ebay/amazon to find this now, I need to watch this scene! I may also have to travel to Italy just to buy a genuine mask (not that I need a reason, I have to go there!)

January 25th

Well I was 23 at the weekend, which feels like such a ripe old age, don't get me wrong, in the world of numbers it's still an insignificant little one, but growing up from 13-16-18-21 to now be 23 feels like old age.

In my attempt to organize my life, make myself more grown up a task i've set myself) I have a list of goals to get me through, some mundane, some necessary, some essential, most need accomplishing within the next few weeks.

1. Hoover once a week 

2. Do 1-2 loads of washing a week.

3. Take at least a few photos a week (or people, what i'm doing, anything)

4. Apply to 2 jobs per week.

5. Have at least one bath/pamper evening, where I sit and relax instead of stressing.

6. Complete a book within the next month.

7. Dust off my sewing machine and actually MAKE something

8. Photograph and sell my clothes on ebay, I dont wear them, they dont fit, I dont need them, money I do. 

9. Print off all photographs and put them into the lovely albums I received at the weekend.

10. Try and keep our flat tidier so it's a more relaxing place to come home to.

Note: Extra

11. Organise my life using my diary, look back into my diary to organise my life.

12. Learn how to put little buttons at the top of this blog and make a prettier layout

13. Photograph more on my DSLR

14. Buy more polaroid film complete. Need more now!

15. Finish season 3 of gossip girl.

16. Arrange a date night once a month with the Mr.

17. Save and research for our holiday £100 in piggy so far, gulp.

18. Put pictures up on the wall

19. Archive my old magazines for images/photography/clothing ideas, instead of having them sitting on my bookcase, arranged and never looked at.

20... All I can think of at the moment.

January 21st

Jayma Mays: Glee's Emma has such an exquisite style! Adorable little twin sets, blouses, she hs the cutest face, like a little rabbit. I would love to own her wardrobe.

January 21st

I feel like i'm stuck in a massive rut, i'm so bored with everything going on and craving something new. I always want to be busying myself with something or being somewhere, but I can't afford it, after paying out my rents and bills there isn't enough left over to really be doing anything, and I dont even go out or drink. Last year was an exceptional year, i've never had a great year, every month something great happened, ever month my boyfriend and I, friends, family, multitude of people seemed to be doing something or other, and it kept me from being bored. I need a task, a challenge, a project.. I know its not even a month after Christmas, so moneys tighter than usual, its my birthday on Sunday and im not excited for that. I shouldn't be moaning, I have things great, i've just always felt like this since I can remember, every year ive wanted to be doing things, experiencing things.. blahblah.

Maybe its just the post Christmas-January blues, maybe its I need to be more excited career-wise, who knows. I always feel your never allowed to glum or in a rut if you have things okay.. 

I'm really missing my holiday, its the first time i've had a holiday abroad and the first for my boyfriend and I (except for weekend trips), I liked exploring and being somewhere different, obviously Cuba has it great points, it's secluded, half way across the world, stunning (think white sands, turquoise beaches if you've never been), it absolutely blew my mind! Maybe it's my town, it's a dive that has nothing going for it, it's often on the tv as one of the worst towns in the UK, and when I moved away to uni, I promised myself i'd never come back, I never wanted to, obviously like most I ended up back here, and I know I wont be here forever, as my boyfriend and I will one day move closer to his work, and to London, but the whole place depresses me!! There is no life, atmosphere, anything special, just a lot of too angry- continually drinking and fighting folk, who dont even try to find jobs!

Rant over, don't really know what the whole reason for feeling like this is, I think I just have cabin fever and need to be traveling the country doing mindless things like when your a teenager (i'll fill my weekends with this from now on).

Also on a different.. facebook drives me crazy, I logged on today (been a while), I can't begin to state my dislike for it now, its full of old old photos on everyones pages from years ago, folk noone want to remember, times that were so bad photographs are worse than the memories. If I didnt use it to look at the photos from the last year (I only have them from them now) it'd so be gone. phew.. I know 'moaner' right.

I'll happily go back here (note: first day, and yes I am transparent)

I know i'll have a great weekend with my boyfriend and family though, so maybe my moods lifting :)

Maybe I just need to get out of this town (although I love our little home) with him and go somewhere different just us for a day or so, he seems to be the only one to lift me from this mood at the moment.

January 20th

Warehouse also clearly has a theme running through it, and between the two stores, leather, chiffon and nude colours. I absolutely adore nude and every shade there of, but very few work with my skin tone/hair colour. If i done to wear it something darker always has to be added, today I have a silk(y) nude pussy bow blouse, a maroon/wine coloured cardigan and a black skirt, all which balances out my ridiculously pale, and dark hair complexion. 
I love these warehouse bags, and can't work out which clutch I prefer, more blouses and chiffon.. I don't stray from what I love or know.. win the lottery please? (I would then also purchase a lovely house too)

January 20th

I'm really hit and miss with Topshop, i'll either love or hate absolutely everything in store, and I have a slight problem with how expensive everything now is in there. I remember being able to get an expensive dress for £30-40 once upon a time, and I fel that was extortion (I don't earn much, or have much left after bills)..
There's clearly a theme running through what I do like there at the minute, coral/peach/brown.. I don't own anything brown, and don't really know if it'd suit me, but these shades seem like they'd work, there's also a few patterns, a few chiffons, and a bit of leather thrown in. Now if I was rich i'd splurge and this would all be on it's way to me..... damn

I love the editorials in ID magazine

 

I also absolutely love Tim Walker to death, if I could afford his photography book, i'd have it surgically attached to my hands!

Both are perfection, I love all these images, the beautiful soft colours, the enchanting dreamy feel. I want to know how to do this (amongst a list my heights long of other 'I need to know').

Images via Google.

January 19th

I have, since I was young, been in awe of these two. They are so beautiful it's frustrating, how can there be one person who looks like this, yet alone two? I've loved watching there style evolve over time, have continually been jealous of there outfits, and I wont even get you started on how much I wish I had this much beauty... yes i'm clearly shallow :)

January 18th

A little bit of blurb I don't know where to put or even if it bears any relevance to anything.

I'm yet to know what this blog is, i'm a ridiculously scatty brained person with my mind going off in tangents within seconds. I think sometimes my boy finds it hard to keep up, as often a confused look jumps to his face.

I don't completely understand this site, or how to make things pretty, for the time being (without the buttons i'd love) there is a nice colour and I can insert pictures, works for now. I read hundreds of different blogs, fashion blogs, beauty, lifestyle. I wish I could incorporate these things into mine, but I currently don't feel comfortable with my style or my appearance to have anything worthy of documenting. Currently whatever pops into my head will most likely be posted, it's how i've always been (fortunate or unfortunate) in life, so why would I change now?!

I'm a fashion design graduate currently working as a website product photographer for a fashion company. My days are spent with flashes going off in my eyes and sitting on the computer photoshopping until I can no longer see. Days vary as to whether I like my job or loathe it, it's not the area I feel is best for me, but whilst I don't have a clue where I want to end up, but currently this is a good place to experience the working world, and don't think for one second im not greatful for a job when I know its difficult finding one. Getting this job was lucky for me, i'd graduated uni and came back to the dead end bar job i'd been doing on and off for a few years, I met my partner, quit my shit job (earning nothing!) and was unemployed for a few months, sending off 7-10 applications weekly for everything, and doing a few months of home caring in the mean time.

Fashion and clothes have been the only thing that I can think back to have interested me as much when I was 12/13 as they still do now. I'm not continually up to date with current trends, and buy vogue more for the editorial shoots (fashion photography is my art) than I do the knowledge of what the future trends are (oops). I love creating garments and pretty things, but doubt i'd want to pursue design other than for my own gratification, a beautiful silhouette and a delicate fabric and I crumble. I love dressing others, and have a huge fascination with craving this experience, but I find it irritating I have no idea how to dress myself! I know what does and doesn't suit my 'shape', but this is as far as my creativity seems to go at the moment.

See the pattern, I ramble.. continually. I can see myself varying between posting 5 times a day to not having a single thought for a month! Whilst trying to figure myself out career wise I share a lovely little flat with my boyfriend, a wild creative, who loves making noise (works in sound for films) and is as spontaneous as a child life is never dull and I love him unconditionally. Meeting him has helped shape who I am, a process which was very much overdue, I adore him ore than anything and he is my complete world and I can't wait until we own a little house and can get a dog (I really want a dog!)

So here's a little about my life :)

If I could look like anyone, and own there wardrobe it would be her! I adore her clothes, style, everything. She is far to beautiful and whether or not her outfits would work with my [ever so different to hers] shape I would love to own them. Four series in and I still can't get over her, pure perfection!

Blue Monday

 I just heard on the radio that it's blue Monday, fitting really with the ridiculous monsoon I had to get to work in!I finally got there 20 minutes late, the early bus didn't show, and the normal timed bus (which gets me to work on time) was late! Added a passenger started arguing with the bus driver about the fare when we were 15 minutes away, bus driver refused to move until he shut up.. blahblah.. LATE!

Good news is I have a giant redbull sitting next to me, ready to get me through the day.

Recent Cons:

-The internet in my flat doesn't seem to ever want to work! Internet + sky + mac = no go. Intermittent and completely non-existent when necessary. -I'm 23 at the weekend, the age scares me! Not even considered a juvenile adult anymore, lame.

-I don't get paid until Monday 31st Jan and i'm currently broke! Added in my birthday at the weekend and i'm going to have no pennies to do anything, great timing.

-I've run out of clothes to wear to work, working in a fashion company full of glamorous, tall, skinny, perfection (maybe an slight exaggeration, there are some normal folk) with no idea what to wear causes a headache.

-As previously stated everyone (not everyone) at my work dresses impeccably, has perfect hair, and is tall and slim, why am I the one (there's a few but not many more) exception?

-My flat looks so empty without the Christmas tree

Recent Pros:
-Went to see 127 hours at the weekend with my boyfriend and some friends, it was great, better than I expected and we were all really proud of all his work that he put into it (pretty awesome seeing his name in the credits)

-Had a lovely little weekend with my friends and boyfriend

-Flats tidy again: yay!
-Online food shopping is on its way tonight, greatest invention of 2000's I think, thankyou mr tesco man

-I have so many things to sell on ebay- if I ever get round to putting them on, hopefully  I might make at least a tenner! That makes me £10 richer thankyou!

-Americas next top model tonight: cycle 15, has it gone slightly overboard? I adore the amazing photoshoots

-Glee.. I hate it, I love it, I hate it (I hate the singing), I love to hate watching it and it amuses me

I'm going to sit and dream of summer holidays, a nice way to get through the work day

Note: My mood didn't get any better, and all in all not a great day!

Andrej Pejic

Can anyone else get there head around the fact that this is a man? Beautiful, but how is he not a female?

My head can't comprehend ha! And those bloody legs, life's unfair!

http://www.bh-news.com/eng/index.php?view=article&id=4042%3Abosnian-andrej-pejic-is-the-face-of-marc-jacobs&option=com_content&Itemid=9

Andrej explained when he started to develop his unique image: "At age 13 I became an eccentric, I toyed with looks. I did not care what people will think or say. I began to dye my hair. I decided to act in accordance with my internal, female sex, " stated Andrej.

Calvin Klein

Anyone else find Calvin Klein jean ads rather erotic? Oh Boy!

Pop

When I was younger I always wanted a Polaroid Camera but never got brought one, a few years ago just as the polaroid cameras were being discontinued I snapped one up on ebay, and had a year or two of fun before the film also was discontinued. Absolutely gutting!

At christmas my boyfriend surprised me with a fujifilm instax 210 (its the most incredible and fake looking camera ever). It was a lovely surprise because every time i'd lust after the camera on the internet i'd say to him when I got paid i'd buy one, but every month after paying to get to work, the food shopping and to live in our home I have not much left, so when i opened it I was ecstatic, and out of everything I got, this was and is my most favorite. I've already used the film and need to buy more asap.

I have so many cameras on my list I want to own, many vintage 35mm SLR's are in my 'watched' ebay. I own a Canon DSLR 450D which I love and take anytime I go somewhere that calls for more than a compact camera, and even that one I love, a little sony cybershot 12MP for those nights out, and capture moments.

I NEED THESE IN MY LIFE:

Fujifilm Instax Mini (to carry around in my bag, as the others so big, and to create different photo sizes)

Lomography Action Sampler 35mm Camera (this looks so so fun!)

Lomography Action Sampler 35mm Pop Novelty camera (the same as above but in pop colour form)

I'm also so tempted to root through my families house and see if I can find just a normal 35mm camera (we had hundreds of compacts), just to play around with. Note: need to get dads SLR fixed.

If I had £200, id buy all these cameras, and then about £100 worth of film on top! I doubt i'd manage to get any 'incredible' photos, but I love the messy flawed film photographs. I went through a massive stage of just buying disposable cameras for nights out/birthdays/any camera event and didnt touch my digital for a year! This would work out cheaper in the long run, and be a nice surprise when opening the packet of produced photos. Plenty of reasons to buy :)

Images from google

A Late Welcome

.. 6 days late, i'm bringing in 2011. Always the latecomer, and always a procrastinator.

As i've previously said new year means pretty little to me, i've never been one for thinking 'this will be my year, better than last' etc. sometimes I wonder if i'd thought like that, maybe being more positive it would have improved my year instead of me letting it spiral, nethertheless i've gotten where I am with just plodding along, with many downs along the way. This was until last year, my first blog post was about new years and how unimportant it had previously been to me, but how positive I felt about the year coming up (see first post Jan 2010) and then it happened.. I had the most prefect year! 2010 was MY year! I don't know anyone that i've spoken to who has had a perfect year, where everything seems to have just gotten better and better, and I can't beleive after everything I had one! :) I said I hoped the year was on the up and that I hoped it would continue, it did, it still is and I hope 2011 trumps it! I hope everyone had a great 2010!

So here's a very fashionably late welcome to the new year! I can't wait to see what this year has in store for me, my boyfriend, our house, my family and friends.